THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS IRISH:
- HE NEVER GOT MARRIED
- HE NEVER HELD A STEADY JOB
- HIS LAST REQUEST WAS A DRINK

THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS PUERTO RICAN:
- HIS FIRST NAME WAS JESUS
- HE WAS ALWAYS IN TROUBLE WITH THE LAW
- HIS MOTHER DIDN'T KNOW WHO HIS FATHER WAS

THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS ITALIAN:
- HE TALKED WITH HIS HANDS
- HE HAD WINE WITH EVERY MEAL
- HE WORKED IN THE BUILDING TRADES

THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS BLACK:
- HE CALLED EVERYBODY BROTHER
- HE HAD NO PERMANENT ADDRESS
- NOBODY WOULD HIRE HIM

THREE ARGUMENTS THAT JESUS WAS CALIFORNIAN:
- HE NEVER CUT HIS HAIR
- HE WALKED AROUND BAREFOOT
- HE INVENTED A NEW RELIGION

AND FINALLY, THE PROOF THAT JESUS WAS IRANIAN:
- HE WENT INTO HIS FATHER'S BUSINESS
- HE LIVED AT HOME UNTIL THE AGE OF 33
- HE WAS SURE HIS MOTHER WAS A VIRGIN,
- AND HIS MOTHER WAS SURE HE WAS GOD